I need to vent!!!
As I've alluded to, our new foster kid Gio got into some trouble. Before he came here, he and a couple of other Children's Home kids got into a fight with a man, and they beat him up pretty badly. There was a witness, and the guy, and all three of them were brought to the police station for questioning. They all denied what happened. Keith is the one who had to take Gio, and he was disgusted by Gio lying, saying he had no idea what they were talking about, he wasn't there, etc. This is just a few days before he came to live with us, but Keith brought him here that night for dinner, and we talked with Gio. We told him that the right thing to do was to go back to the police and admit what he did, say he was sorry, and cooperate with them. He refused at first, but we told him that if he was really intent on turning his life around, he had to start doing the right thing. After a bit more talking and coaxing, he agreed. Keith took him back down the next day and he talked to the detective, and told him exactly what happened, but only about himself, he refused to say anything about the other two boys....but at least we'd made some headway. The detective told him that he was proud of him and really appreciated him being honest.
A couple of days later, Gio comes to stay with us. He said he wants to change his life, and wants more than a life of getting into trouble and being a street kid. Not his exact words, but that's the gist of it.
He's here for three weeks. In that time, his grades go up in school. He's earning 100's on his behavior points, I have teachers coming up to me saying what a difference they've seen in him. He had many heart-to-hearts with me, where he told me about his miserable home life, lack of any kind of consequences for his actions, and a mother who never really cared at all what he did. He said that he never really felt support until he met us. And, that he really thought that Keith and I were the only two people he could trust.
Then I got a call that I had to take him to the detention center. I took him there, thinking he'd be charged with something, then sent home. Wrong. They kept him. We went to his first hearing, and the bitch who worked at juvey said we weren't allowed to go in, but she'd tell him we were there. At the next hearing, we were allowed in. In the meantime, we've visited him every time we're allowed to (twice a week) and I write him letters several times a week. He writes to us too. At his second hearing, he says that he's going to plead guilty. They drop all but one charge, and he makes his plea. Then the judge asks if there's something he'd like to say to the victim. He looks right at the guy and says, "I'm sorry. I'm manning up for what I did, and I'm sorry. That's all I can say" I was so proud of him.
Now, they've sent him to Philadelphia to their Juvey (because even though it happened here, he's a ward of Philadelphia, so that's where he has to go). Right before they sent him there, he got his weekly phone call and called me. The other two boys still aren't admitting what they did, and none of their charges were dropped, so Gio saw the benefit of "coming clean". But, today when he called, he told me the victim didn't show up for the hearing for the other boys, and he has to come back later in the week and pick them out of a line up. If he can't do that, the other boys get off. Gio would never testify against them, he was their friend. (Even though in my opinion, they're hanging him out to dry). He said to me, "See, I was right. If I wouldn't have gone back, I wouldn't be getting sent to Philadelphia. I would be home by next week. They're beating their charges. But, it's too late now"
God, do I feel awful. I still think it's right that he admitted what he did and pled guilty, but where's the justice? How do I expect this kid to learn a lesson when he's going to serve some time, and the others are going to get off scott free? I know that I wouldn't want him to have lied, but don't you think he should get some kind of break for fessing up? I could just scream! See how good it is to do the right thing, Gio? See how great it will be living here with us, being honest and doing the right thing? Oh yeah, as soon as you're done serving what ever amount of time some Philadelphia judge says you have to serve, while your buddies are free, running the streets. And, I told him that I felt awful about this whole thing, and you know what he said, "Don't worry about me. It's okay."
4 comments:
justice is not always served. it is hard to teach kids to do the right thing when stuff like this happens. i guess you have to tell him that even though the kids who got off are free, he did the right thing, and in the end, that is what matters. he can look at himself in the mirror and be proud. the other kids, not so much.
i don't understand why the man suddenly quit caring about the other 2 boys getting justice? ca you call the detective and ask him to talk to the man? life isn't fair sometimes. also, i wonder if the man did anything for the three boys to want to attack him? i'm not blaming the victim, but i find that very rarely is an attack unprovoked. the murder rate where i live is shockingly high, but 99.9% of it is criminal on criminal. it's like there are two baltimores, one for criminals that's dangerous and one for the rest of us, that's as safe as middle america.
Schell, bottom line is that Gio was honest, manned up and now he has to serve what he has to serve. He's learned that behaviors have consequences--those other two boys mat never learn that lesson. Tell Gio not to dwell on the other two, that he has to live his life the best he could and hopefully it will pay off in the long run.
Sometimes the criminal justice system sucks a big one, but he should be proud of the fact that he stepped up and acknowledge his part of the crime
What they all said. It's true that the outcome seems unfair but, he is learning to take responsibility and consequences for his actions and even though he may be punished and others get off -- he can look at himself in the mirror and hopefully turn his life around and the other two will likely not.
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